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Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Hey hey blog readers. What's going on? Today's blog is dedicated to my tiggle--(that's my nickname for Myriam)--we have called each other tiggle for nearly 12 years. She's super awesome in every single way.

Ok--life is good. My one person show is scheduled for August 24th, 2011. Because sooooo many people are interested in my performance, I am having two shows in one night. You can see me at 7 and again at 9. From what I hear, the tickets are selling pretty well so make sure to buy them in advance. I would really hate it if you came to my show and it was SOLD OUT. 50% of the proceeds are being donated to AMP Lgbtqia and the other 50% will be paying part of my September bills:)

Many of you love me so much but live very far away so, I will be making a DVD and CD of the event You can order one and I'll send it to you str8 away. DVDs of the show are $10.00. But wait, here is the BEST deal EVER: For $15.00 you will receive a DVD of the show, a soundtrack with cool music, AND my tiny book of haiku. Email me for more info. My email is: and my mailing address is 1531 E Walnut Way Long Beach, CA 90813 if you'd like to send a check or money order for the DVD:) Thanks for your support.

Everything is going pretty well. M and I are in Santa Maria this week visiting her family which is always fun. Bob makes such amazing meals for us. I love it when others cook for me:) We are coming back to Long Beach on Thursday and will be stopping at the Skirball Center in LA to check out the Houdini exhibit. It's free on Thursdays.

Ok--I am really sad about Amy Winehouse, but am not at all surprised. Addiction is a very terrible thing. I just hope that she has some peace now wherever she is.

I might run the Atlanta marathon next year. My dear friend Thais (who has been Myriam's best friend since age 4) is visiting from Hotlanta and we talked about it today. Stevie--wanna run in it too? Let's take Georgia by storm.

In the last three weeks I have read 10 books that have dealt with faith one way or another. I find people's journeys to and/or from faith fascinating. Here is the list and my overall thoughts on 3 of the books. I'll blog about the other 7 tomorrow.

1. I'm Perfect, You're Doomed: Tales of a Jehovah's Witness Upbringing by Kyria Abrahams. She is pretty funny and the book does a great job of explaining that particular religion. She's kind of whiny though and you can tell that she was pretty spoiled growing up and, very used to getting her way. I like her snarky humor. B-

2. Prison Angel by Sister/Mother Antonia. Ok--I loved this book. This amazing woman has spent the last twenty-five years living in a prison in Tijuana. She grew up in Beverly Hills which makes it even more amazing to me. Her fearless drive and selfless dedication are very inspiring. I loved it. A

3. Escape by Carolyn Jessup. She left the FLDS. It was a great read. Highly recommended. If you want to know more about the FLDS--this is the book for you. A-

Recently I read an article about people buying more generic products--you know--because of the economy. I find most generic products to be just fine however, there are a few things that are worth the extra pennies. I have tried the following products in a generic form and WAS NOT HAPPY. I reccommend that you always spend a little extra when it comes to: Mac&Cheese (Kraft), Hot Dogs (Nathans or Hebrew National), Soda (always buy name brand soda--Dr Skipper for example is disgusting), Alka Seltzer (the non name brand make me throw up which completely defeats the purpose of Alka Seltzer), Tuna (just don't) , and Ice Cream.

Ok--that's it for today. We have a big day scheduled tomorrow so I am going to call it a night. Still looking for a job BTW so if anyone hears anything--let me know. Thanks for reading. Comments are always wonderful. Being 40 has been super awesome so far. Love to all.

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Best cd ever, what in the hell have I been up to, and green grass.

Forgive me readers for I have sinned, it has been two + weeks since my last entry. Ok--so much has happened in the last fourteen  + days. Lord have mercy. Here are a few pics of what has gone on.

On July 1st, I turned 40. I was really really freaked out about it but once I embraced it, it was awesome. The picture above is from my skate party. I rented a roller rink and everyone had a really great time. I am so appreciative to all of the people that came to the big event. I had hundreds of well wishers that could not attend but were there in spirit. I felt them there--but it's a good thing that I didn't have to pay admittance for each one:) The woman that runs the roller rink said that in the 30 years that she has been there, she has never seen such a diverse group of people at a birthday party. Cool. I take pride in that. If you'd like to see other pics--check out my facebook page.

On July 2nd Myriam and I had an impromptu commitment ceremony at the zoo. We have been together for almost 13 years and figured it was about time we had SOMETHING. We plan on having a big party to celebrate this occasion. I will keep you all posted. We had a small private event for a number of reasons: 1. We are cheap. 2. well, there really isn't any other reason:). All kidding aside--we had a rough year. During my midlife crisis I actually left thinking that the grass would be greener somewhere else. HA. I was an idiot but that is a whole different Oprah. Here is what I learned about greener grass: 1. If the grass looks greener somewhere else--chances are--you just need to work on your own yard to beautify it. 2. If the grass somewhere else is indeed greener--chances are--a lot of fertilizer (SHIT) was used to get it that way and NOBODY needs more shit in his/her life. Myriam is an amazing person--she has loved me unconditionally for over a decade. All I know is that I am glad that I saw the error of my ways and that Myriam was --well, Myriam. We are doing very well now. Working hard to keep our own yard green--without using shit to do it. Just TLC is all we need.

Ok--so recently, there was a motorcycle rally protesting helmet laws. One of the participants crashed and died. He would have lived had he been wearing a helmet. Natural selection? Yes, I believe so. Don't get me wrong--I don't think anyone should be forced to wear a helmet on a bike or even a seatbelt in a car. arresting or ticketing people for victimless crimes is really a waste of time--if people want to be stupid without hurting anyone else--just let them. Focus on the texting teens--they scare the hell out of me. 80% of my students admit to twi (texting while driving)--but hey--they wear their seat belts!! Ridiculous.

Here is another interesting story: Budget cuts are happening in Miami. Why you ask--well, the city has to lay people off because the "red light" cameras that catch people when they run a red light--only caught enough people to cover 1/5th of the projected number. In other words, because drivers in Miami are indeed following the traffic laws--they now have to lay people off.

The man that caught Derek Jeter's 3,000th hit ball gave it back to Derek Jeter. Some people say that was neat--I think it was stupid. Mr Garth--(he was my 4th and 5th grade social studies teacher, he reads my blog, and he LOVES baseball) what do you think? I'm dying to know.

Betty Ford was awesome. I'm so glad that she was able to live a long happy life after exposing and facing her demons. Goodspeed Betty.

Here is the playlist from my mix cd from my birthday bash. Several of them just went out in the mail--if anyone else likes the list and wants one--let me know. It's super awesome.

TJ’s 40th Birthday Bash and Skate Party Mix CD

CD 1—that’s right people—it’s a double CD
1.      Bea Arthur is the sexiest senior citizen ever—club mix of Golden Girls theme
2.      Bueller
3.      Green Giant
4.      First Mash-up of many!! Beyonce goes to Mayberry—WTF! Awesome
5.      Laverne and Shirley (TV show from the 70s) The () was for all those 20 somethings who probably do not even know the showJ Yikes.
6.      Mashup #2—what what? OZZY meets Pink meets Kelly Clarkson! Yep—triple white trash on one song.
7.      Lick a Lolly from 1975—what—that’s right—lick a lolly—just listen and laugh
8.      Happy Days—you know how I feel about the FONZ
9.      Mashup #3—who is it? Well, it’s UNK, Avril Lavigne, and Toni Basil—oh mickey you so fine….you so fine you blow my mind hey mickey.
10.   Silver Spoons REMIX—cool sitcom from 82-86 people.
11.   WOAH—I’m stuck in the 80s remix and medley
12.   Stay tuned—stay tuned for what?—oh the ABC Afterschool Special
13.   Mashup #4—wait for it…..The Jackson 5 and Guns and Roses. Oh Snap!
14.   LITEBRITE—need I say more
15.   Mashup #5—the 70s and 80s collide. Diana Ross and Dead or Alive—go ahead and tap your toes—it’s ok
16.   It’s the Bugs Bunny Looney Toon Comedy Hour!!!
17.   JUST SAY NO PEOPLE—Drugs and caffeine are evilJ
18.   It’s Fun to Smoke Marijuana. What? Oh—it’s Queen mashed up with a sermon on the evils of rock music.
19.   NEXT MASHUP= AWESOME. Notorious B.I.G. and Miley Cyrus.  Yes—you read it right. Hannah Montana meets Biggie Smalls.
20.   The Electric Company theme song from 1971—the year of my birth—we’re gonna turn on the power!!
21.   It’s the Muppet Show! Everyone Loves Kermit. Animal is my favorite.
22.   You’ll jump and jive—American Bandstand.
23.   Mashup-the 80s meet today—Jump you fu****! Cee Lo Green meets Van Halen
24.   Talent shows are for who? South Park. Need I say more?
25.   Oh Gary Coleman—we miss u. Diff’rent Strokes theme song.
26.   Mashup-Queen and David Bowie meet Taio Cruz—yeah I throw my hands up in the air sometimes—
27.   Bea Arthur shares a story—just sit back and enjoy it people.
28.   Mashup! The 80s meet the 90s. LL Cool J and Dexy’s Midnight Runners. What, knock out Eileen?
29.   Fresh Prince=nuf said
30.   Where is the best place ever? That’s right, Toys R Us.
31.   SUPERSTAR by one of my heroes, RuPaul.
32.   I’m a Loner Dottie with Prince playin in the background
33.   And then there’s Maude (Awesome show from the 70s) If you’ve never seen it, you should.
34.   My favorite song of all time—Forever Young
35.   No Whammy
36.   Who’s in charge? Oh, Charles is in charge. A short lived sitcom from the eighties
37.   Mashup—Aerosmith, Run DMC, and Nelly Furtado. It’s sweet.
38.   Mashup—the 80s meet today—Rihanna and Hall & Oates. Ha! Rude maneater
39.   Believe it or not, I’m walkin on air. The Greatest American Hero (sigh)
40.   Oh what’s your name? Oh, your name is LUKA and you live on the second floor. OK
41.   Theme from One Day at a Time. Schneider=a poor man’s fonzie.
42.   HEY HEY HEY it’s a Fat Albert Remix.

CD #2
1. Mashup—whoa Pitbull, The Ying Yang Twins and Kool and the Gang. Lord have mercy. We gonna have a good time tonight.
2. Though he never speaks—he has brought us joy for years. MEEP MEEP
3.   Come and knock on our door. Three’s Company rocks out
4.      Shut up and give me some cherry pie=WARRANT meets the Ying Yings.
5.      I love the way you lie REMIX and mashup—so many artists, so little time.
6.      The 70s and 80s meet again. Disco and Rock= Gloria Gaynor and Suvivor.
7.      Can the Beatles REALLY mashup with Lynard Skynard? Y yes they can. Full on mashup—just listen— you’ll love it. It’s my mix. Me=DJ No Clue
8.      ABBA and Lil Wayne Mashup? Yes. Can’t we all just get along?
9.      Oh you were saved. By What? Oh, the bell. Cool. AC or Zack?
10.      Double 80s people. Joan Jett meets the Beastie Boys. Life makes sense now.
11.      Soulja Boy and the Go Go’s? Can that be real? Yes it can. Next thing ya know there will be a black man as President.
12.      FAME—yes, I’m gonna live forever AND I’m gonna learn how to fly.
13.      Sesame Street. See, one of these things does not belong here, one of these things is not the same.
14.      Many mashups—tap your toes cuz it’s awesome
15.      Who’s the boss? Tony Danza is the boss.
16.      Best thing since sliced bread—just listen
17.      N.W.A. and Nirvana? Yeah, they had the marijuana thing in common. Smeels like it’s straight outa Compton.
18.      The age old question is asked again. What can you get a nudist for her birthday?
19.      He’s dead. Who’s dead? The radio star, and video killed it. Punk version.
20      I.s that Cory Feldman and the truffle shuffle? Yes it is.
21.      DEVO and Willow Smith. WTF. Oh—she whips her hair back n forth
22.      Salt n Pepa with the Yeah Yeah Yeahs. Yep, they pushed it. They pushed it real good.
23.      Can the smurfs really have a rave? Yes they can.
24.      So many white men in one room. Bon Jovi and Huey Lewis and the News. It’s 1988 all over again.
25.      You take the good you take the bad. The Facts of Life.
26.      Philosophy in the 80s
27.      The one and only Michael Jackson meets the one and only (also born on 7/1/71 just like me) Missy Elliot.
28.      I got Pacman fever and it’s driving me crazy.
29.      Ultra mashup
30.      The whitest song on here=Billy Joel meets Petula Clark. LOL
31.      Summer of 2009 mashup
32.      Don’t you forget about me.
33.      Hey. Thank you for being a friend. Seriously, thanks.

Ok--let's see--what else is going on? Oh--I have a show coming up and it's a big one. Save the date--August 24th. More info will be posted after I finalize the details with the promoters next week. If you do not live in So Cal and want to see it--you may order a dvd. All proceeds from the show are going to AMP lgbtqia. I'm going to blog again soon--seriously--soon. Never again will I let so much time pass between posts. In fact--my new goal is at least 3 per week. Tomorrow's blog will discuss books I have read over the summer, the movie Bridesmaids, a little more about my show, Kesha Hondo, and a few observations. Thanks for reading everyone. I've missed posting--comments help with motivation btw. TJ